In the beginning of my art practice, much of my work has been about chasing love. I did a series of paintings showing the balance in love.
Then, a decade ago, a close friend of mine was going through a divorce. The husband was so unkind over so many years. Pained listening to her story, I wanted to paint her hurt. The paintings expressed looking one’s own heart while outside of one’s body. The anatomical hearts where covered in gauze. The mood was somber.
A few years later, I illustrated the emotive processes of falling in love. Really it was about the high and excitement in the beginning, which isn’t love at all as Hollywood would have us believe. I illustrated what the scientific community “discovered” goes on in the brain in the stages of love. “Natural Selection” is a literal interpretation. In other paintings, it is not so literal. In “Love Net” I paint a net of shared memories around a couples embrace.
Then, I was left at the altar and I seriously questioned what love was. In hindsight, love is patient… it’s not falling from the sky.
How could I reconcile the paintings of love when I wasn’t in it? So, I made doppelgangers of the original image. The word Doppelganger came from a writer who wrote under a pseudonym in 1796. A doppelganger isn’t someone who just resembles you, but is an exact double, right down to the way you walk, act, talk, and dress. I painted a mirrored silhouette of the original, a doppelganger.
Thereafter, the doppelganger morphed into a reflection of one’s decision-making. Outwardly, the woman or the doppelganger looks the same despite the internal battle. The hair of the figure is the only representation of this intangible energy.
Now the doppelganger represents a double mindedness that exists within introspection. The repeated figure has a rhythm that is undeniably soothing and beautiful.